Valentines.

Also know as singles awareness day.

Most of us are stuck at home without a date while the happy couples are out snogging each other.
Nast.
Until I actually find love of any sort in my heart, I will call Valentines nast.
Until I can stand being next to a couple without the urge to punch them, I will call Valentines ugly.
And until I can stop being alone on any given holiday, I will rebel against valentines.

After today, I will buy all the leftover chocolate and make fondue with bananas ;D
It's my anti-men thing. >.<
I hate valentines because right now, as you read this, people all over the world are screwing each other. The image is gross and EW.

So how am I riding out this Saturday the 14th?
Im my room, alone, watching friends while sipping coffee.
I woke up just a meager 51 minutes ago at 2:07.
I plan on throwing away my wallpaper and painting my room black with white streaks.
My friends are all at the mall.
I ditched my friends cause I woke up at 2.
I woke up to pee at 6 am.
I have not eaten breakfast or lunch.
I am consuming McDonalds because I am hateful and depressed.
My body is lurching for fries, but I have none.
My novel has not moved progress.

I had a dream about my perfect imaginary guy.
He was non existant when I woke up.
All guys in the world are OLD.
The cuter men are taken.
Men are wusses.
Men stay away from me.
Therefore I repel men, which means I will never find a guy.
Henceforth: Disney is an asshole; dreams never come true.


Men ignore me.
I get selfconscious.
I assume I am not pretty.
They think Im insanely self obsessed=
I cannot get a guy.

I have never hugged a guy
They assume I have guy-phobia
I pretend to have guy phobia
They stay away=
NO GUY.

I am a domestic goddess.
Men are afraid of being tied down.
I will tie them down with ropes if I have to.
They are afraid=
Me, guy-less

I am skilled in ass kicking.
I can shoot a gun.
Men are afraid of eing overpowered.
I threaten, they run or look at me strangely=
WTF IS WRONG WITH ME.

Inavertently, I want to be loved.
The right guy never comes along.
If the right guy did come along,
he has a girlfriend/spouse.
I'm not "that slut"=
Alone forever.

I am short.
In stereotype:
GUYS LIKE TALL GIRLS
WITH BOOBS.
Me= A-cup + 5"1
Me= invisible.

Lecture time!
Why do men like boobs?
Because, they are looking for a mate with a good chance of producing healthy offspring.
Boobs= better chance of healthy offspring by better feeding.
By nature, men are programmed to screw a chick and produce children.
Women, knowing this, are screwed.
STDs are just nature limiting your pleasure.
-END OF LECTURE-

So guys are after one thing,
Whether they like it or not.
This author is pretty pessimistic.
I'm guessing that I'll remain single for a few more years,
and get a boyfriend sometime before high school ENDS.
And on 12. 21. 12, I'll perish with the rest of the world.

Sayonara FREAKS.
I hate Valentines day.
It makes me more depressed than the usual.
-sigh-
back to friends.

-Juliet